April 12, 2009

Yea so today was Easter, and on my mind was a lot of things but Easter. I worry. I worry a lot about what my next move will be. And also who will it be with. Im a student at Shawnee State but im not sure for how long. Money issuses once again. So I strated to fast for a miracle. I need a financial miracle. No pork, no fish, no beef, just chicken. And after I accomplish that task than I will stop eating chicken too. I stress so hard about my life and how i will reach my gaols. It's hard being a young woman in this world. Keeping my grades up and trying to take care of my family in the long run by staying in school is hard. No im not complainning i love to be in school, i just hate to wait. I'll admit i wish i could speed up the process of my goals and hurry and pay off my families debt and my own from school and live an "happier" life. But we all know that money dont make people happy. Only people make people happy. Well thats what i believe. I have dreams of becoming a fashion designer. I would love to be completely independent in that field. Meaning i dont want to depend on others to do their job right and when it should be. I want to have the ability and smarts to do them myself, including hair, make-up, photography and above. I want my creations to be done the way i want them to be interpreted with or without the help of others. I would just have to find workers that believe the same thing. I love what I'm doing right now, which is studying Pscyhology. Yes, i want to do them both. Pscyh will give me the ability to read my clients better and know how to advertise things and to get my points across the right way the first time. I want to do something I've always wanted to do, plus something that I'm good at. Either way it goes, i'll be happy. Sinlge or not...im too strong of a woman to fail.